Come and Gone
Christmas has come and gone in every corner of the globe and the wave of Christmas cheer has subsided and the tides return. The full moon has peaked and now wanes and so too me.
Christmas was difficult this year, the obligations of the new culture I am in and the expectations of the season were a lot harder to manage than I anticipated. Today, Boxing Day I found myself alone and in a big empty flat and silence from the street below. The rooms were empty except for my thoughts which fulled every crevasse and nook. I sat quietly this evening and found myself in tears as I looked out my window. I wish I was as strong as I used to be, I wish I was as flexible and resilient, the simple fact is that I am not.
I grew a beard this season, as much to hide behind as to keep my face warm in the minus temperatures. The gray is showing so much more in my beard these days than I remember, probably why I don't grow a beard as often as I used to... Much like my beard I find this season has wash me clean of all the colour I had. I will be so happy to be back at work tomorrow. Discussing Hofstede and his national comparsions. I need a break from me.
Don't get me wrong I am not sad, or more to the point I can't distinguish sad from anything else these days, which in my situation is a blessing and not a curse. So reader please don't concern yourself too much with my daily goings ons. I am just a pebble in the big scheme of it all and I know it. I just choose to share there transient thoughts with you as they wander across my mind.
Penny Century had her estranged husband come home and I was yesterdays news. Playing happy families is a key element of the season as we all know and do in our own way. So in all the aspect that count I was alone this year, as usual, tho this new year I have nothing to look forward to as I did last year. I can't believe a year has gone by, can you? I do sincerely hope that those closest to my heart had the Christmas they really wanted and had worked hard for. One perons in particular deserves a reconciliation with her family, I do hope in some form or fashion it happened for her and her heart is just that little lighter of the huge burden she has placed upon her soul. Christmas is the time for miracles, so I can only hope it brought her some relief.
Christmas was difficult this year, the obligations of the new culture I am in and the expectations of the season were a lot harder to manage than I anticipated. Today, Boxing Day I found myself alone and in a big empty flat and silence from the street below. The rooms were empty except for my thoughts which fulled every crevasse and nook. I sat quietly this evening and found myself in tears as I looked out my window. I wish I was as strong as I used to be, I wish I was as flexible and resilient, the simple fact is that I am not.
I grew a beard this season, as much to hide behind as to keep my face warm in the minus temperatures. The gray is showing so much more in my beard these days than I remember, probably why I don't grow a beard as often as I used to... Much like my beard I find this season has wash me clean of all the colour I had. I will be so happy to be back at work tomorrow. Discussing Hofstede and his national comparsions. I need a break from me.
Don't get me wrong I am not sad, or more to the point I can't distinguish sad from anything else these days, which in my situation is a blessing and not a curse. So reader please don't concern yourself too much with my daily goings ons. I am just a pebble in the big scheme of it all and I know it. I just choose to share there transient thoughts with you as they wander across my mind.
Penny Century had her estranged husband come home and I was yesterdays news. Playing happy families is a key element of the season as we all know and do in our own way. So in all the aspect that count I was alone this year, as usual, tho this new year I have nothing to look forward to as I did last year. I can't believe a year has gone by, can you? I do sincerely hope that those closest to my heart had the Christmas they really wanted and had worked hard for. One perons in particular deserves a reconciliation with her family, I do hope in some form or fashion it happened for her and her heart is just that little lighter of the huge burden she has placed upon her soul. Christmas is the time for miracles, so I can only hope it brought her some relief.
My night now after a message is well Pienkna - kocham was moją wesołość translation here.
posted by Obi Won Kenardly at 11:28 pm
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