Broccoli is waiting

It has been a long time since an old friend of mine invited and unvited me to the biggest day of his life. The rejection at the time was insurmountable and unexplained to any degree or satisfaction. The world turns and lives change... but I am still waiting.

The promise of something to ease this huge gaping hole is as yet not forthcoming. I am almost embarrassed to say that it still means something to me and that I hold out for some answer beyond the obvious evidence. I still wait. Can't say I am happy about the waiting but for some reason beyond my understanding still do. This old friend doesn't seem to realise that the longer he takes the harder it gets to bridge the gap. I sometimes wonder if he even cares that it the gap is bridged.

Back to Moscow and it seems that I may not be evicted on Christmas Day. I think management worked out a deal with Attilla The Landlady and maybe, just maybe I may be able to stay. I doubt it and I, being the most interested party, was not told of the result even after I saw the land lady leave.

A new teacher arrived today and I met the jocular American. Quite the relaxed fellow and a relief as the last American was a complete and utter far kwit. I just hope that they dont replace me with the next teacher that comes along.

I cannot say my life has any even keel or soilid foundation none in fact, I could be cast adrift tomorrow, but something in it makes me stronger and more focused.

Obi is missing his support at home, the one that started into the whole - "Oh, he is flailing and failing again" routine, which I hoped that person could see past and actually believe in me. But no, not gonna happen, incapable of that. So I leave the world of the closed mind and lack of empathy to the solitude and 'salvation' of Jesus books.

Obi gutted but not out.